What I Learned about Burnout and the Need to Let (Almost) Everything Stop

I had burned out and had no idea I was doing it.

All my intentions were good.

My actions were service-oriented.

But it was too much, and I couldn’t hold it all up.

I have taken a 6-month break from content creation for Integrative Studio.

It was not an easy decision to make.

At that time:

  • I was ending a 20-year career of adjunct teaching (which is the ultimate dangling carrot for academics because a university will more than likely NOT progress a service-led teacher earning less than a graduate student in wages, but teaching core classes that grow the university’s bottom dollar, into a full-time salaried teaching position).

  • I was starting a new professional track in learning and development for an essential public authority in NY State.

  • I was coaching private clients after work hours and on the weekends.

  • I was creating and posting one YouTube video every week.

  • I was creating and posting two podcast episodes a month.

  • I posted regular content on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn, including daily stories.

  • I was teaching 2-3 yoga classes a week after work hours and on the weekends at the YMCA.

  • I was writing and participating in a poetry group.

  • I was practicing violin and playing in an amateur orchestra every other week.

  • I was taking weekly violin lessons to keep up with the musical demands of the orchestra.

  • I was solo-parenting my tween daughter every other week, while staying available to her in every way on the weeks she was with her dad.

  • I was finishing up my twice-weekly physical therapy to rehabilitate my knee, which I had shattered in Nov. 2022.

Honestly, I’m exhausted reading this list.

As you can see, almost all of these commitments are service-oriented, people-oriented, and/or are geared to enriching my creative self.

I love every single item on this list.

But, altogether, IT’S TOO MUCH.

I had to step away.  I took a hard stop at almost all of it.

  •     I left my position at the YMCA.

  •     I stepped away from the orchestra and the poetry group.

  •     I stopped violin lessons.

  •     I finished my coaching sessions with my clients and turned away new inquiries to focus my time on my well-being after work and on the weekends.

  •     I stopped making YouTube videos.

  •     I stopped creating content for Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

The only things I kept on my plate were my work in Learning and Development—I chose to go ALL IN to learn everything I could about it while serving my co-workers to the best of my ability.

I spent much more time with my daughter when I had her on my schedule instead of leaving her for a bit to teach outside of the home.

I kept up my podcast since I had just started it and wanted to see where it could go.

I added one new item to my life:  triathlon training.

See, when I had shattered my knee and was dramatically limited in my mobility, I made a promise to myself to live life more fully through movement (MOVEMENT is one of my six central core values).

My times after work and on the weekends were now focused on running (which looks more like jogging!), bike riding, and swimming. 

My daughter enjoyed going to the lake for the group open-water swims, which was a win-win! 

I created new friendships, got much stronger in my knee (and whole body), and celebrated movement, fun, and community in richer ways than before.

But, I felt something was lacking.

I missed teaching people in person.

How could I fulfill that need when I had left adjunct teaching?

I re-applied for my old job at the YMCA teaching yoga and, thankfully, they eagerly took me back (and I was so humbled and pleased my students were eager to attend my classes).

I realized that teaching yoga in the studio is still a way I can share a practice that enriches lives,, and I can connect with people meaningfully.

I am just now easing back into content creation for social media and YouTube. 

I am hopeful I will find joy in connecting with my audiences again and that content creation for those mediums will not feel as heavy as “work,” because I can re-frame it as a teaching practice for connecting with others. It will be my service to others.

Thank you for sticking with me during this break. 

I created a podcast about my break and why PLAYING became so restorative.  I hope you will have a listen.

All my best,

Melissa

batch 1-30Melissa Hurtburnout, personal development, personal enrichment, rest